As a child, I used to have that recurring dream and that I can still vividly remember. The sky was pink, an Israeli soldier was running after me, then comes my salvation: a ladder that leads to a cloud on which was the Egyptian actor Sameer Ghanem. Yes, I admit it, I was a fan of Fattuta (in my defense I was 5 years old or so). Have I bothered to figure out what that means if it means anything at all? No. Why am I telling this? Because it’s the oldest dream I can remember and in retrospect I find it a bit weird, I mean come on, the sky was PINK!

As I grew up I can’t say my dreams got weirder but let’s say there were different new features. Once I heard that there are two things you can’t do in a dream: switching the light off and turn around. So, there you go, I decided I should try it. And I did, I went to sleep and the next thing I knew I was in my dream, knowing that I was dreaming, trying to turn around and switch the light off. I know you might be wondering it worked. Well, it didn’t, but we can never be sure because the subconscious could be so tricky.

One of my all time favorites was that dream where my cousin and I were in a store and somehow we find ourselves in a situation where we were allowed to take everything we want for free. As we, in the dream mind you, were so busy packing things my sister stopped by in a go-kart-like car and told us that we were dreaming (what a buzz kill!). My cousin, in the dream mind you, was bummed. She was like: “Nooooo! Pinch me so I make sure” and so I pinched her and she was like: IK don’t feel anything! We are in deed dreaming!

That was something!

In another dream that I can’t remember anything of except the last part, my cousin and I were running and all of a sudden we realized that the dream came to an end, so I told her to stop right where she was so we can continue the adventure in the next dream.

But my favorite series of dreams was the one following Tawjihi. You know how everyone dreams that they are having exams after they finish school or college. In my case, it was freaking me out, seriously! Creepy nightmares in which I didn’t know the answers or couldn’t do the tests for some reason or another. So finally I could take it no more. I said to myself: next time, I will remember that it’s a dream. And so there I was a sleep and seeing myself in a room where my teacher was giving me the test paper. And then, before I started doing the test I stopped and said: Wait! This is a dream, I know it! I finished school! And so he smiles like sheepishly and says that’s absolutely right!

But recently, I must admit the most amazing thing happened to me in my dreams. A dream I had told me what I wanted. It told me what I was thinking, something I wasn’t aware of. It opened my eyes to reality. And that’s in my opinion is the greatest thing about dreams; they tell you the things you’re afraid to admit. They expose you to your own self. Your own fears and feelings. Not always pretty, but unlike reality, you cannot escape it and you have very little control over it.

Just don’t stretch it or over think it, and relax, I believe Paulo Coelho was being symbolic! So, Don’t take the next plane to Malawi or start digging in your Grandma’s backyard. After all it’s a dream, enjoy it while it lasts…

Rainbows are fascinating things, a colorful illustration of nature and a great symbol of how there’s always something good to look forward to after every adversity. Yet, most people I assume come to be familiar with rainbows as children through cartoons. Personally, I haven’t seen a real rainbow until I was probably 10.

It was a stormy day. My mother’s aunt had just passed away and my parents were at the wake, leaving my sister, brother and me at home. I can’t remember what year exactly was that but I’d say my eldest sister was around 13, I was 10 and my brother was 6, something in that vicinity.

The storm began raging outside, the rain was pouring and the wind was blowing against a small window in the laundry room. We started to panic, I don’t know why exactly but we were really scared and before we knew it we were crying like we’re in the middle of a nuclear war. We were utterly terrified, I remember that my sister was weeping and saying: “Our science teacher died this week, mom’s aunt died this week and it seems like we’re going to die too!” NOT HELPING!!

Well, looking back at this I think that either she was terrified of the concept of death due to the death of her teacher, or she was enjoying seeing us suffer. Well, I think that in this context the former explanation makes more sense, although we enjoyed seeing each other suffer as kids when we thought it would do no harm.

I can’t remember exactly whether the storm had subsided before my father came home or the other way around. All I know is that the weather calmed down just as we relaxed, had lunch and watched a movie we already recorded on tape, it was called “Buried Alive” or some such horrifying name, then we huddled over the window to see, for the first time as far as I’m concerned, the beautiful rainbow that was formed as the storm bid us farewell. It wasn’t like the one we used to see in “Sunbol” but it was truly a sight for the sore eyes, which makes me think now that it’s probably not the rainbow alone that puts a smile on your face, but the storm that preceded it, and the harsher the storm is, the more beautiful the rainbow is in the eye of the beholder.

For a moment, she doubted the conclusion. How could he not be a person? But she thought again. There can’t be more than one. It’s him and will always be him. It was him before she was born and after she bites the dust. It has always been him, whether she realized it or not.

In an effort to understand what was going on through her mind, she tried to remember how she felt the first time she realized he was the one. And then, she remembered the taste of the first new crush sometime after she was convinced he wasn’t. If he was a person, then how come she found him in two separate persons? A person can’t be two persons; it was mathematically impossible, she thought. Hence, it was clear to her, again, that he was not a person.

But, who was he? Or, what was he?  And those feeling she had, to whom were they? Maybe he was those very feelings. That’s it. She never loved a person, she always loved the love she held for that person, the love she felt from him and all the things it made her feel. He was her desires fused to the mortal believed fit to fulfil them. He was the manifestation of her desires, the mirror of her better self, the answer to many unspoken questions. Yes, he was many things she couldn’t express, and once again she was certain that he was not, and cannot, be a person.

She remembered that teller in the bank. Oh, how much he looked like him! She used to stare at him while standing in the line to cash her paycheck. Perhaps it should’ve bothered her. Perhaps she should’ve changed her bank, but it doesn’t matter now, because he no longer looked like him.

“Who is he?”

She remembered the last time they spoke. He was so mean, or at least not as nice as she wanted him to be. Many times has she promised herself she wouldn’t do it again, but that feeling, that wicked wicked feeling would budge in and push her to throw her pride to the wind. But that last time they spoke was more than she could take, she knew that had to stop. But that doesn’t matter now, because it was no longer the last time they spoke, in fact, they haven’t said a word yet.

She remembered that look on his face, it had puzzled her for sometime. Maybe it was the look of regret, or maybe it was that of nostalgia, but it doesn’t matter now because whatever it was it was long washed away down the stream. There was now a new look, one she didn’t get to see and was afraid to interpret in any way.

“Who is he?” the question loomed again. He could be the answer or the question. Could be the end of one misery and the beginning of another. He could be a dream come true or a walking nightmare. He’s been there before she was born and will continue to be remembered long after she’s forgotten. “Who is he?” She had no idea, and the question sounded too loud in her head that it almost deafened her. Perhaps she passed him that morning on the street. He was looking for her too.

“Who is he?” She knew very little.

“Who is he?” She couldn’t tell, but one thing she could tell for sure…

He is not a person.