Few needs of the human heart are greater than the need to be understood- to have a voice that is heard, respected, and valued- to have influence. Most believe that the key to influence is communication- getting your point across clearly and speaking persuasively. In fact, if you think about it, don't you find that, while others are speaking to you, instead of really listening to understand, you are often busy preparing your response? The real beginning of influence comes as others sense you are being influenced by them- when they feel understood by you- that you have listened deeply and sincerely, and that you are open. But most people are too vulnerable emotionally to listen deeply- to suspended their agenda long enough to focus on understanding before they communicate their own ideas. Our culture cries out for, even demands, understanding and influence. However, the principle of influence is governed by mutual understanding born of the commitment of at least one person to deep listening first.
The other day I read a story by Ghassan Kanafani, called ستة نسور و طفل(A child and Six Eagles), in which the narrator is a newly appointed teacher who taught in 3 villages. In his way in the old car, there was that rock that was the subject of some folk tales. It's all about an eagle that was seen standing on the rock in spring time, and when summer comes, the eagle is no longer seen there. Everyone in the village had their own version of "the eagle's story". Some said the eagle stood there every spring because its mother was killed there. Others say that it was a female eagle, whose "husband" dumped her, so she stood there crying in agony till it dropped dead. Others were more realistic by saying that the eagle used to stand there before the police station was built, then some policeman shot it down. The teacher himself becomes so interested in those stories that he ends up making up his own version. At last, he learns from a child that there was no eagle at all, it was just a cranberry bush, that grows in springs and withers in summer. Now the story made me think, how real is that? So real. I think it represents the reality that we all take pleasure in denying. I think it varies from one person to another, some people are more realistic than others, but even the realistic ones might fall in this. You know when you think of something in some way, then you start asking yourself why? Then you examine possibilities, and at the end, you come to the final conclusions and it's the one that appeals to you the most. You then start having doubts, but you cling to your conclusions, eliminating all other possibilities by the slightest shadow of doubt. After that, when things start to clear up, you see that you were mistaken, and that's were the shock comes from, especially of you hadn't prepared yourself before. Sometimes things take long to clear up, and sometimes, you might give up and go on with your life, not wanting to know whether you were wrong or right. You think maybe it's better this way, keeping it as a nice dream, not wanting to know the truth because it might be so harsh. I think the problem is when you don't know whether you're right or not, but at the same time, you can't go on with your life, you refuse to, or you just can't.
Tag rules:
- Grab the closest book to you
- Open page 123 (shme3na??)
- Scroll down to the 5th sentence
- Post the next 3 sentences on your blog
- Name the book and author
- Tag 3 people
not that I'm gonna read them all this month of course, but I couldn't resist getting them RIGHT NOW!
by Miguel de Cervantes... I got it in English though, not Spanish... Frankly, I want to enjoy the book, Spanish can wait! It's a very long book, but I am so thrilled to read it, and I hope I will be able to review it here... some day!

a torqoise scarf... I love torqoise! And I had soemthing very delicious, watched a crappy movie... but it was funny, like watching Sasooki :D Though it was supposed tobe a thriller, Woooooh! What else? Yeah I slept over at my uncle's houseand had a good time with my cousins. Aaaand that was my not-so-weekly weekend report...
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