Few years back, I was walking in the neighborhood with a friend when we heard the screams coming from one of the houses in the street. They were the sounds of a man and a woman who seemed to be having a big fight. He was cussing her and her mother out and then it sounded like he started beating her. You might think those things only happen in movies, but what we heard was so loud and so intense like those things you see in Arabic movies, or worse, in Kuwaiti Drama. Few years have passed since then and although I passed by that house many times I didn’t hear similar noises again. I always wondered about the family though, but didn’t give it much thought, not until 2 days ago when I heard 2 neighbors talking about a woman in the street, who turned out to be the same woman I heard fighting with her husband years ago. It wasn’t over yet. They said that the people who live next door to them hear them fighting all the time. They said that they heard their children crying while their parents fought and called each other names. They even said that from the sound of it the man seemed to be giving his wife a beating. They said they fought day and night and the neighbors could hear it all. That night I stayed up at night thinking how this marriage could have survived all these years of possible physical, verbal and emotional abuse. What could’ve become of the children? Why are these people still together if they fight so much? Then I remembered the national campaign about domestic violence and how everyone is responsible, especially when it came to the children, and that’s when I started to seriously consider reporting them to Family Protection. To tell you the truth, I still have my doubts about this. I mean, this woman must have endured all those years with her husband for a reason, so what if she refused to cooperate with the police or denied any abuse? But then I thought about the children. I mean she’s an adult and she’s free to do what she wants but it’s not up to her to expose her children to all that violence and abuse. But again, I thought that although this doesn’t seem like the happiest family on earth, but what if this intervention made it worse? What if the children were caught up in an ugly divorce and instead of watching their parents slamming each other at home they could be dragged to see it in court. I’m really not sure what to do, but to think of what this could turn into I feel responsible to take and action to nip whatever might happen in the bud. So, what would you do?
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from Ireland
said:Shit happen!
you have nothing to do with personal-in-private-non-of-your-business-things .. its their own life and freedom
its their fault to accept to live with each others, and being non low profilers!
no need to expose people
from Jordan
said:what a terrible dilemma. i would be inclined to worry about the children and their safety. by complaining to the Family Protection Department you will be dragging the family into the justice system but on the other hand if you say you are worried about the safetly of the children maybe a visit from the social workers may help to solve the problems. Though once there is sustained violence in a family i cannot see that changing. the Family Protection Dept do try to keep these kind of cases out of the courts if there is another way to address the problem. so call them and take their advice!! T
from Jordan
said:Patricia and Siegex: thanks for the insights
Amr: Well I don't belive it's none of my business as long as children or any helpless person is involved
from Jordan
said:without hesitation, you should report them, as the children shouldn't be exposed to such a dark behavior.
it's our responsibility to protect them from such abuse.
Interesting...
i sigh in relief to know there are people in this world who still care for the wellbeing of others.
Recently, there was a case in the media, about a single mom, who physically abused her 5yr old, to an extent that the doctors cant pinpoint a spot on the body that has no wounds/scars. Even his teeth were chipped, if not broken altogether. Apparently the family and friends knew of this, but put up the attitude of 'non-interference', until a newspaper crew spill it out.
The child is now under the care of a welfare organisation, and claims that he still loves his mom, eventhough she beats him.
As for the family and friends, they are coming up with 1001 reasons why they didnt reported it earlier.
Going back to your situation, I'ld say, go report it. They will check it out...and they will decide if the case's worth handling.
from United States
said:If it were only the couple, I wouldn't get involved as what they do, is their business and their's alone but as there are KIDS involved, I would report the abuse - for the children's sake! If nothing will happen on their behalf, these poor kids will have to grow up like this and get traumatized over and over again ...
It is an "iffy" situation and I do well understand your dilemma but I guess you should take a stand!
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from Jordan
علا، مرحبا يا قمر
كيفك؟؟ زمان عنييييييي =P
عزيزتي ادراة حماية الاسرة ادارة اصلاح مش ادارة تفريق بين الزوجين او افراد الاسرة
التبليغ لحماية الاسرة يعني انهم رح ياخدو على الرجل تعهد انو ما يتعرض لزوجتو باي شكل من اشكال العنف، وعالأغلب بيخلوه يجيب كفيل يوقع على كفالة معو
هاد هو اللي رح يحصل ازا بلغتي، وطبعا بدك المرأة نفسها تتعاون معك او مع حماية الاسرة وتحكيلهم انو بيضربها او بيغلط عليها او اي شيء من هالقبيل، وهمي على طول بياخدو عليه تعهد ما يتعرضلها
متى ممكن يصير في مشاكل بهيك تبليغ؟ ازا المرأة نفسها راحت على الدائرة القضائية في ادراة حماية الاسرة وبلغت عنو انو ضربها، ساعتها اعتقد بيتم تحويلو للمحكمة وبتصير بينهم قضية وخلاف وازا اثبتت انو انضربت بتقرير طبي مثلا عالأغلب وحسب قرار القاضي بينسجن الزلمة حسب حكم القاضي
اما انو التبليغ بدون الشكوى للدائرة القضائية هاد هدفو منع العنف او التقليل اوالحد منو قدر المستطاع
مني ومنك ببلغ
على كل حال انتي ازا حكيتي مع حماية الاسرة اعطيهم خبر انو ما بتعرفي الست هاي ويمكن تنكر ومن هالحكي واسأليهم ازا انكرت هل بيطلع عليكي اي تبعيات قانونية ولا لأ، وبعدين همي حرين بيقرروا ازا بدهم يطلعولها زيارة أو لا
واعتقد عالأغلب بيطلعوا زيارة على بيتها